Wednesdays are great for Wordless and Wordful posts, but we decided to go a different route and create our own Wednesday fun. We figured what the hell. That’s how we started What The Hell Wednesday. Who are we kidding? That’s pretty much how we decide on almost everything. If you want to play along, grab our button on the sidebar, link up to us in your post and don’t forget to sign in to McLinky below. Really, what the hell?
Stacy
Logging onto the website tonight to write my What The Hell’s for this week I see that we have 34 comments. Yippee….oh no wait, they are all Spam comments!! What The Hell? Why can’t we have real comments and not stupid spammer one’s?? We’re funny dammit!! I can’t wait until we finally “catch on”.
So last Friday I got a tattoo. I’ve wanted another one for awhile now, and had warned my Mom so it wouldn’t be a big shock. I got a semi-big butterfly on my back, no it’s not a tramp stamp, it’s just a butterfly tattoo. When I showed it to people they would all ask the same question, “Did it hurt?”What The Hell? Seriously, it’s a tattoo! They use very sharp needles into your skin, of course it hurt!! Duh!
The kids are back to school now, well at least 2 days back to school. The bus picks them both up at 6:40 a.m. What The Hell?? 6:40 a.m.?? Don’t they know I am not a morning person?? I am a night person, and getting up at 5:30 a.m. is really starting to mess with my night person activities!!! Like watching t.v. and using Facebook, doing laundry and cleaning….
Elle
In case you’ve been wondering What The Hell happened? Why haven’t those damn Blue Monkey Butt girls posted What The Hell Wednesdayyet? I was busy Skyping last night and then slept until 9:30. That’s right, I said 9:30! My kids still have one week of summer vacation left and we are finally sleeping in. I don’t know What The Hell will happen in a week when we have to start getting up at 6:30 again.
Did you hear about Paris Hilton’s latest arrest? Apparently, or should I say allegedly, she had cocaine. Her super duper smart excuse? She thought it was gum. What The Freakin’ Hell?!! Gum? Is she so stupid that she thinks people buy that crap?
The news is just full of What The Hells this week. I just read about a doctor in California that first tried to force her way into her “on-again off-again” boyfriend’s house with a shovel. When that failed she got a ladder and tried going down the chimney. What The Hell was she thinking?! Ya….if you’re not the Grinch or Santa Claus it doesn’t work. I have to admit, every time I see the Grinch and see him get stuck “for a moment or two” it makes me uncomfortable.
If it’s Tuesday this must be, Random Tuesday Thoughts. It’s brought to you by Keelyat The Un-Mom. She really knows how to rock Tuesdays so go and check her out and tell her the Blue Monkey Butt sisters sent you!
Stacy
Sending my youngest to Middle School was way harder than sending my oldest to Middle School!
Getting a tattoo on your spine for 2 hours will hurt like hell!
The lunch boxes that were on sale for school this year stunk! I went to two different stores and still couldn’t find anything good! Unless I wanted Hannah Montana or the Jonas Brothers, which my 10 and 12 year old boys did NOT want!
The 80’s / 90’s styles that are coming back are just scary!! What is wrong with the fashion industry? Who would think bringing back those fads would be a good idea? Ugh!
There is no way I will be able to watch the Season Premiere of Hoarders this weekend! In the commercial they show a house that is just infested with bugs, like maggots, and a opossum running around. Okay, EWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
Elle
We still have one week of summer vacation. I think pretty much everyone else in America has started school, but not us. We’re still suffering loving these last days of summer vacation.
This morning when J-Man asked me for an ice cream come for breakfast I gave it to him. I think I’m beaten down from the heat and the constant I’m hungry, I want something, What can I have? all day long.
We did a little school shopping this weekend. Sissy knows what she likes and of course, what she doesn’t like. So far we’ve been able to agree, but it takes a while. Then I went over to the boys department with J-Man. I would hold up a shirt and ask “Do you like this one?” He’d shrug his shoulders and grunt some sort of response. Finally after doing this several times he looked at me and said “If you like it, I like it.” To which I responded “I love you!” I’ve been doing clothes shopping for 3 girls for years and it’s never easy.
Hey, don’t forget to join us for What The Hell Wednesday tomorrow. There has to be something in the last week that’s made you say What The Hell?!
Wednesdays are great for Wordless and Wordful posts, but we decided to go a different route and create our own Wednesday fun. We figured what the hell. That’s how we started What The Hell Wednesday. Who are we kidding? That’s pretty much how we decide on almost everything. If you want to play along, grab our button on the sidebar, link up to us in your post and don’t forget to sign in to McLinky below. Really, what the hell?
Stacy
Last night I decided to go back to coloring my hair, REALLYred. It’s so dark it’s almost fuchsia. What The Hell? That’s what I said when I saw it, I looked in the mirror, thought to myself how red it was, and then said, “oh well, what the hell? Guess I’ll just go with it.”
Next Monday the boys go back to school. That means I have to get both of them ready and on the bus by 6:40 a.m.! What The Hell???? I am not looking forward to that, and doubt they will make the bus much!
I have so many email accounts, it’s ridiculous. I don’t even look at half of them, I hate email. I don’t mind texting, because it’s short and immediate. Emails are like work. I have a comcast email, a yahoo, a work email, a blue monkey butt one, and a google one for football. What The Hell? I have no interest in reading any of them!
Elle
Um, ya, don’t bother emailing Stacy at her BMB adddress. She never ever checks it and it’s almost been terminated at least once because of non-use. What The Hell Stacy?
While we were at Disney, I saw this woman walking around with an unusual pedicure. Instead of having pink nails and white tips, she had black tips. Ewwwwwwwwwww! It just looked like she had really dirty toenails! What The Hell dirty toenail lady???!! It just totally almost made me projectile vomit. Still skeeves me out just thinking about it. So you can count me out of the black toenail tips style.
If it’s Tuesday this must be, Random Tuesday Thoughts. It’s brought to you by Keelyat The Un-Mom. She really knows how to rock Tuesdays so go and check her out and tell her the Blue Monkey Butt sisters sent you!
Elle
J-Man sometimes has trouble getting his sister’s attention. This is usually how it goes
J-Man: Blah, blah, blah, Yoshi, blah, blah, watch me play my video game, blah, blah, Mario.
Sister: {complete silence}
J-Man: Hello?
Sister {more complete silence}
J-Man: Hello? Can you hear me?
Sister: {nothing}
J-Man: Hello? Are you death?
Makes me laugh every single time.
Today is my one year anniversary of what I refer to as my year of pain. No celebrations, confetti or parties because really, who would celebrate that?
I just saw a commercial for an upcoming Phineas & Ferb episode. Doofenschmirtz and Perry totally team up to take out vampire ninjas. Is it sad I want to see it? C’mon, ninja vampires, who wouldn’t want to see it?
I have to admit that I’ve lost my car keys. I haven’t been able to find them since we got home from vacation. I’ve gone through everything and they just aren’t there. I tried to call the lost and found at Fort Wilderness but just got the answering machine asking me to leave a message with my site #, phone number and a description of the item I lost. Then they sign off with “Have a magical day!” It’s going to have to be magical if I’m ever going to want to drive my car again. My husband isn’t going to continue letting me use his keys forever.
Stacy
Ever wonder why gay guys have that accent/lisp thing going on? I mean does that come standard with being gay? I’m not being mean, I like gay guys, I just don’t understand why they talk like that. I guess it’s the same as when you’re from the South, you just talk that way.
I noticed the other day when I see some one’s name and it’s Chinese or of Asian origin I have to pronounce it out loud. I don’t know why, but I do it all the time. Weird.
Did you know that if you take your right foot and turn it clockwise in a circle, while trying to draw a 6 on a piece of paper, your foot will turn the other way? You know you’re trying to do it right now.
Kibbles and Bits dog food is made with industrial laxative, just ask my dog. He’s the one rubbing his ass all over the backyard.
Don’t forget to join us for What The Hell Wednesday tomorrow.
Wednesdays are great for Wordless and Wordful posts, but we decided to go a different route and create our own Wednesday fun. We figured what the hell. That’s how we started What The Hell Wednesday. Who are we kidding? That’s pretty much how we decide on almost everything. If you want to play along, grab our button on the sidebar, link up to us in your post and don’t forget to sign in to McLinky below. Really, what the hell?
Stacy
Yes I was M.I.A. yesterday for RTT, which is too bad because I actually had a few random thoughts. There’s always next week. I’m sure I have some WTH moments from the past week! Over the weekend we went to an amusement park for my youngest son’s birthday. I didn’t want to take the camera because I was afraid it would get broken or wet, so I just used the camera on my cell phone. That worked fine, but for some reason my computer will not save the pictures! What The Hell?? I open the pictures, hit save and end up with a blank picture!!! What the hell is wrong with this stupid computer??? I cannot save any of the pictures I took!
The other day at work I was standing next to the printer trying to help someone fix it. Well, there is this woman at work that no matter what you’re doing, she thinks she has the right of way. Most of the time she barges right through without saying anything. That day she stood behind me, made the “clear the throat” sound and said “EXCUSE ME” real loud. What The Hell? Can’t you see I’m in the middle of doing something here, I can’t move out of the way at the moment and I’ll move when I’m done??? I said, “Sorry, I’m a bit busy trying to fix this, if you can wait a sec I will move when I am done.” To which I got the extremely loud sigh that she makes that reminds me of Darth Vader taking a deep breath….no offense.
So can anyone get a show on t.v. now? What The Hell? There’s a bunch of cupcake shows, Little People taking care of pit bulls (which if you ask me is a bad thing because one of those dogs could eat them in one bite), Swamp Men, Axe Men, Gay Men…….You name it, there’s a stupid reality show about it!
Elle
I’m turning Amish. I’m shunning one of my dogs. He’s dead to me, well, except for the feeding and walking crap, he’s dead to me. Now, we were gone for 16 days. When we got home my dog was terrified of me. Completely terrified. Like I was some zombie about to eat his brain, if he actually had a brain. I couldn’t believe it. What The Hell??!!! When our Disney Daughter came upstairs the dumb-ass dog turned inside out with pure joy. Ya, she’s been gone since the end of January.
We brought home a few things from Disney for my parents. I gave my mother a cute tote bag and after I passed it to her I saw it still had the anti-shoplifting ink tag. What The Hell??!! Hello! Emporium people, you kind of ruined that gift. Now it looks like I shoplifted her gift. My mom said she’d still use it, but she won’t. She’ll be too afraid that people will think she stole it. Kind of inconvenient don’t you think. It’s not like I can bring it back to where I bought it.
Wednesdays are great for Wordless and Wordful posts, but we decided to go a different route and create our own Wednesday fun. We figured what the hell. That’s how we started What The Hell Wednesday. Who are we kidding? That’s pretty much how we decide on almost everything. If you want to play along, grab our button on the sidebar, link up to us in your post and don’t forget to sign in to McLinky below. Really, what the hell?
Stacy
Today I had a really bad day at work, I had totally messed something up and couldn’t figure out what I had done wrong. Anyways, I was doing the mail at work, and this woman who is on the new side, came up to me and grabbed my arm. She starting squeezing and rubbing it apparently trying to make me feel better. What The Hell? Personal space, personal boundaries people! I pulled my arm away and said, “I do NOT like to be touched.” So of course she got mad at ME because I said that. Again, What The Hell?? I am not a touchy feely type of person, and I don’t want someone I don’t know rubbing my arm okay? Why am I the bad person here? I sent Elle a text about it and she said, “Without the T in touch, you have ouch.” This is why I love my sister, she can say one thing that makes me literally LOL!!
It’s been really hot and humid here lately and last night we got really bad thunderstorms. Of course we always get them after I’ve put the kids to bed! What The Hell Mother Nature?? You can’t have thunderstorms when it’s not bedtime?? Every single time, it’s like 30 minutes after I put them to bed!! Argh!
Elle is currently on vacation!!!!!!!!!
Okay Elle is off enjoying herself in Disney World right now…..What The Hell? Doesn’t she know we have a blog to write? Doesn’t she know that I never remember how to do the McLinky thingy because she always does it?? Doesn’t she know that this is a team effort? What The Hell??
Wednesdays are great for Wordless and Wordful posts, but we decided to go a different route and create our own Wednesday fun. We figured what the hell. That’s how we started What The Hell Wednesday. Who are we kidding? That’s pretty much how we decide on almost everything. If you want to play along, grab our button on the sidebar, link up to us in your post and don’t forget to sign in to McLinky below. Really, what the hell?
Elle
You didn’t think a little thing like being on vacation would keep me from our weekly Wednesday fun, did you? Really, What The Hell were you thinking? Maybe next week I’ll bow out since we’ll be visiting the Mouse but right now we’re relaxing on beautiful Hutchinson Island and it’s great!
We’re staying at my Mother-in-laws place for a few days. Across the street is a beautiful beach, the ocean and a big clubhouse and pool. Monday night we all went swimming around 8. We all had fun swimming after dark with the water so warm. We tried it again last night. Once again we had the pool to ourselves. They don’t have a lot of lights in the pool area. There are the lights in the pool and then some around that pool that are motion sensitive. The whole pool area is gated and you have to use a key to get inside and back out. Since the other lights were out I decided to go over and make them come back on. I managed to get one light on and went over to the other one. As I was jumping around trying to make it come on I saw a shadow on the other side of the fence. I tried to tell myself it was just my imagination but then the shadow started climbing the fence. Holy crap! Instead of running right then, I stood there watching it climb the fence higher and higher. What The Hell?! I froze just like the losers in horror movies that end up as zombie food. It climbed to the top of the fence and then I saw it scamper across the top and I could see it clearly against the night sky. It was a freakin’ huge raccoon and it was locked in the pool area with us! I turned and ran to the pool yelling “Everyone out of the pool now! There’s a raccoon in here!” The kids start yelling and hurrying to get out. My husband is thinking “What the Hell are you talking about?” I’m rushing the kids. Sissy runs over to our stuff and grabs as much as she can. I threw J-Man’s towel on him and we run over to the gate. I’m fumbling with the key, trying to open the gate so we aren’t trapped with the raccoon anymore. I managed to get the gate open and we all run for our SUV as fast as we can. Sissy is yelling “Let me in. Let me in!” My husband is still back by the gate (the one that lags behind always gets it in horror movies. Doesn’t he know anything?) yelling “Where are my shoes? Where are my shoes?” Sissy had them in her hand so I grab them, run back to him and throw them at his feet and run back to the SUV. We all jump in and slam the doors. My husband looks at me and says “Are you sure you saw something?” What the freakin hell???!!! I know what I saw and it was a huge raccoon and I hate raccoons. J-Man said it best “If mom’s afraid of it then I’m afraid of it.” We all agreed that we were done with the whole night swimming thing. I’d rather get a sunburn than get in a wrestling match with a raccoon any day of the week!
Stacy
The other night I went to the gym, and when I got there I could smell pizza. I looked around and there were a bunch of empty pizza boxes on a table. What The Hell?? Apparently Planet Fitness thinks it’s a good idea to fill you full of pizza! Okay, first off I don’t think you are suppose to fill yourself full of food right before working out, and second, why do they think it’s a good idea to do this?? Elle says it’s job security for them. They even had a sign saying to keep the pizza away from the exercise equipment. Yea because eating a slice of pizza while walking on the treadmill is a bad idea right? My friend also told me that some mornings they have free bagels and cream cheese. Again WHAT THE HELL??? How is this promoting a healthy lifestyle?? I know it’s suppose to be the “Judgement Free Zone”, but I’m definitely judging you on feeding your members crappy food!
The following post contains dirty language (literally), so if you don’t want to read anything that has to do with poop, crap or shit, please stop reading. So, today Elle sent me a text in reference to um, well, constipation. Let’s just set the record straight that neither Elle nor I were constipated, and the constipated-ee I guess you would say, will remain nameless. Well, because Elle and I are like 12 or 13 year old children we continued to text back and forth about this subject. I was laughing out loud (literally) when I was reading her texts, I don’t know if you will find our warped sisterly sense of humor amusing, but I thought I would share it anyways. And Mum, sorry for the excessive “shit” use on today’s post. Here goes:
ELLE: Just got a call that “so and so” has to have X-rays because she’s so constipated or literally full of shit.
STACY: Wow thanks for sharing that
ELLE: If my plans get messed up because of “Full of shit so and so” I will be stressed out!
STACY: That would be pretty shitty.
ELLE: Holy Crap!
STACY: Crap in a crap basket.
ELLE: The shitters full.
STACY: POOP-people order our patties.
ELLE: Oops I crapped my pants!
STACY: You’re shitting me!
ELLE: Same shit different day….literally
STACY: You scared the shit out of me
ELLE: No shit sherlock.
STACY: Shit for brains!
ELLE: Now the shit is really going to hit the fan!
STACY: You’ll be shit out of luck!
ELLE: Up shits creek!
STACY: Wipe that shit eating grin off your face!
ELLE: Shitstorm
STACY: Shitzu
ELLE: Shit on a shingle
STACY: Shittake (mushroom)
ELLE: Does a bear shit in the woods?
STACY: Happier than a pig in shit!
We probably would of kept going but J-Man was playing with Elle’s phone. And just for the record, it’s hard to think up a “shit” saying off the top of your head without googling it!
Elle:
For the record I didn’t have to Google any of them or have anybody that could help. Not like I was going to ask my kids. Just sayin’. I can’t wait to see the keyword searches from this post. Also, for the record and for Mom, I never actually say these things. My worst expression is crap in a crap basket.
Wednesdays are great for Wordless and Wordful posts, but we decided to go a different route and create our own Wednesday fun. We figured what the hell. That’s how we started What The Hell Wednesday. Who are we kidding? That’s pretty much how we decide on almost everything. If you want to play along, grab our button on the sidebar, link up to us in your post and don’t forget to sign in to McLinky below. Really, what the hell?
Stacy
I distribute the mail at work. Today I was waiting for the receptionist to sign for a couple letters so that I could bring them over to the mail station with the rest of the mail. I said one thing to her about one of the letters, and she snapped at me and threw it across the desk at me like a Frisbee! What The Hell? I just said one thing about it! I was actually just trying to be helpful and for the record I was being nice. This is one of the reasons why I don’t like people, they’re moody.
Last week when we went to Bugaboo Creek my youngest had to go to the bathroom, of course. I swear he just likes to check out the bathrooms to see how clean they are and what their soap smells like. Anyways, I wouldn’t let him go to the bathroom alone, he’s almost 10, but I still don’t think it’s safe for him to go to the Men’s Room alone. So I made my almost 12 year old go with him. I figure there’s safety in numbers. They both gave me a hard time about it, but that’s the rule. A little while later I had to go the bathroom, and when I excused myself my youngest said, “you want me to go with you??”What The Hell? That kid is only going to get worse with his wit and sarcasm!!
I saw a story online that a couple was caught having sex by Google Earth. What The Hell? I don’t know if this is true, but I hope not! Talk about invasion of privacy! I haven’t used Google Earth in awhile, but my kids like to use it. Now I’m going to have to keep an eye on my kids when they use Google Earth!
I just saw a commercial for a new movie coming out….Piranha 3D. What The Hell? I’m not a big gory mov ie fan, so I really don’t want to see blood and guts coming at me in 3D! The piranha’s looked pretty weird too! The preview was pretty gross just in 2D, besides it looked like one of those lame Sci-Fi Saturday night movies. I think I’ll pass.
Elle
We have a pterodactyl in our yard. Scoff all you want, but he’s there. I saw him again yesterday and he’s huge. He had a horrible screaming call as he flew into the neighbor’s yard. He landed in one of their trees, still screaming. Then he lifted his tail and there was this huge shower of bird crap. What The Hell???? I got J-Man to bring me my camera and set out to hunt the prehistoric pterodactyl down. He was back in our yard by this time and was still doing that horrible scream that was now driving my dogs crazy so of course they started barking. He was up high in the trees and I knew I was getting close, but I didn’t want to get too close, especially after seeing the shower of bird crap. So I’m ducking my head, like that was going to protect me from the crap shower, and trying to find him. Finally, I spotted him about 20 feet up in the tree. This is the best picture I have of him. He flew off and I haven’t seen him since. But I’m pretty sure he lives in the woods behind our house because this is the second time I’ve seen him. Any ideas what kind of bird he is? He’s pretty big and his legs are longer than they look in the picture.
As of 9:01 last night I am officially on vacation!!!! Woot! What did I do last night to celebrate my almost 3 weeks of freedom? I got home, ate dinner at 10pm (can you say heartburn all night?) and then threw in some laundry and cleaned out all 3 litter-boxes. What The Hell??Do I know how to party or what? I’ve got a ton of stuff to do before we hop in the family truckster and drive down to Florida.
Apparently I didn’t get the fashion memo that you should match your hair to your shirt and sandals or maybe you’re supposed to match only when you are wearing purple. At my last blood test there was a woman, and not a young woman by any means, with purple hair, a purple shirt and purple sandals. Okay, maybe not so bad, but on her shirt was one of those big yellowish-greenish tree frogs. Okaaaaay, but the clincher was the matching, and I do mean matching, frog purse. What The Hell????? I wanted to take a picture soooooo badly but my phone makes an obvious “click” noise and I’m not that mean. Plus she might have beaten the crap out of me with her frog purse.
If it’s Tuesday this must be, Random Tuesday Thoughts. It’s brought to you by Keely at The Un-Mom. She really knows how to rock Tuesdays so go and check her out and tell her the Blue Monkey Butt sisters sent you!
Stacy
The other night I got to use my Employee of the Month gift card to Bugaboo Creek. During dinner my almost 12 year old son looks around the restaurant, looks at me and says, “this is the fanciest resturaunt I’ve ever been to.” If you’ve never been to Bugaboo Creek, let me tell you, there are a lot of dead animal heads on the walls, some actually talk, and fake fish flap their tails like they’re dying. Yep F A N C Y! Maybe if you’re a redneck.
While at Bugaboo, it must have been some one’s birthday because out of the kitchen came about 6 Employees clapping and singing Happy Birthday. I glanced over at my youngest son who is almost 10, and he was just utterly appalled! The look on his face was priceless! Then he noticed they had a huge stuffed moose, and made the birthday person kiss the moose. He said, “does everyone who has a birthday have to kiss the moose?”. I said, “Yea I guess so, why?You don’t want to kiss the moose?” Him: “NO!! If everyone kisses that stuffed animal with their lips, just imagine all the gross mouth germs all over the moose!” He is a bit germ-a-phobic, but the kid does have a point, ewwww!
I just realized that I’m not really doing this post correctly, I mean I’m suppose to write random thoughts I have, like how I hate skinny jeans on men, and they just make them look stupid, not stories that have happened. Technically if I had used the stories from above I could of had a post or two. Oops….
Have you noticed that a lot of people on Facebook are bi-polar? Seriously, there could be a status update from someone that says, “I love life so much!” And then 10 minutes later the same person writes, “OMG I can’t stand people, they suck and so does my stupid life!!” This is why they get un-friended so much…just sayin’
Elle
I only have to work 4 hours tonight and then I’m done until after vacation! I can’t wait! I might be there physically, but in my mind I’m already on vacation. I’m guessing the frozen margaritas will have to wait another day. Work probably wouldn’t appreciate it but maybe if I brought enough for everyone it would be okay. Remember back in school there was that teacher who said “Unless you brought enough for everyone put it away.” I always wanted to be the kid who actually brought enough for everyone just to bug the teacher.
I’m getting better with my new phone. I’ve only made a few accidental calls today. I downloaded a flashlight app and passed J-Man my phone. He was all over it. I’m thinking I should’ve asked my 8 year old son how to use my new phone. Maybe the cell phone gene is the same as the video game gene.
I love this commercial. I don’t have any patience for drama and this is totally the type of therapist I’d be.
Don’t forget to join us for What The Hell Wednesday tomorrow!
We're 2 sisters who blog about whatever captures our interest. We don't take ourselves too seriously and we're both pretty sarcastic. We've got husbands, kids, dogs, cats, jobs and crazy, busy lives. If you have a product,or say, for instance, a trip to Hawaii or Disney World that you want us to review on our blog, please contact us. If you like what you read, or don't, leave us a comment. If you're Phil from the Amazing Race, we'd love to try that out, although neither of us knows how to drive a standard. Could be trouble, that's all they ever drive on that show. Thanks for stopping by. elle@bluemonkeybutt.com stacy@bluemonkeybutt.com
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